How To Win The Mega-Millions Lottery


So for the people that know Ephman well, know that he's no gambler.  It's not by choice but rather by luck.  The stories are numerous, from getting stranded flat broke in Atlantic City (while he was living in Canada), to losing all his Europe trip money in the casinos of southern France.  Ephman's seen it all on the losing side.  He's not even going to mention the three times he's been to Vegas, played at a charity casino, or a small casino in Northern Ontarion.

But today he felt lucky, today Ephman felt like he could win.  So with $20 he lost but then found, he used it all up on lottery tickets.  See a few weeks ago on July 7th, 2009 a person won $133 million.  The ticket was bought in Queens.  Well good for the winner, that bastard.

Which led the question to Ephman of if he won what woud he do?  Probably just keep his job.  The last thing he'd want to end up like Jack Whittaker, winner of $314million.  Who LOST IT ALL!!!!  Just google the name and find out what the heck happened to this broke ass bloke.

The trick to winning the lottery is very easy.  Don't play.  If you don't play you can't lose, but then you also can't win. Ephman knows the logic is flawed.  But if you take $20, and very rarely play, there's a chance you'll win something.  And that's the crappy strategy he's got.  Wish him luck and watchout for the update.  The drawing is on Tuesday, July 21 2009.  21 is a luck number right?

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Fine Ephman Played Again!

So stupid.  But doesn't some of the money go to charity?  Anyways, the jackpot is $250,000,000, and Ephman's got a 175,711,536 to 1 chance of winning it.  At least there's a chance.  Hey, Ephman will even share the jackpot if there's another winner :)  Good Luck Ephman!

The Update You All Have Been Waiting For....

As expected Ephman WON NOTHING!!!! blew his $20 right away.  Good bye $20.  So what does he do next?  You guessed it "took the 9 bucks in his pocket and threw it away on another set of lottery numbers".  This will be the end of that.

have no fear!

Ephman forgets about NNNNOOOOOOBODY.

Ephman is the MAN

Hey Ephman, when you win dont forget the little people like us who reall all of your COOL stuff.

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